Loving Elephants

I want to own an elephant.

Why? Absolutely no idea. But I want one. I love them. Always fighting the large cats and the all-time classic labrador retriever, elephants have recently become my favorite animals. If you asked me why, I wouldn’t know what to tell you. Like I said, I have absolutely no idea why I love them the way I do. I just do. 

Yes, I realize that elephants are in fact quite dangerous. Because of that, I understand I probably will never, ever own my own, but I can dream. Can’t I? I can lean back in my chair, sip a hot cup of tea, and think about the success stories of people who have taken in wild animals from birth and raised them to be “domestic.” 

No matter what terror stories I hear about domesticating an elephant (or any other wild animal) or stories about how crazed they can become in their natural habitats. No matter the truth that a single misstep by one could crush my entire body. I can still gaze upon a fantasy that will never become a reality. 

Why?

Because I love elephants.

There are a lot of things I dream about doing. During church this morning the pastor was talking about giving. How much should we give to the church? Is tithing enough? Is tithing still relevant to our lives today? What about besides money? What else should we give away? I starting thinking about how I conduct my life and about all God has blessed me with. I began thinking about whether or not I need all I have or if most of it is just stuff. As I thought, it inspired me to create a bucket list of things I want to accomplish with my life. 

So far, this is what I’ve got (minus the whole elephant fascination);

The Bucket List

1. Give away everything I own to someone who needs it more (at least once in my life)

2. Explore the world

3. Use my writing ability to improve the world in some way, shape, or form

4. Live in a city

5. Live on and maintain a farm

6. Raise a family, by birth or adoption

7. Give everything I am to one man alone - the one God has planned for me

8. Find a place to volunteer (long-term)

9. Live without worldly “basic needs”

10. Become an artist

11. Forget about body image

12. Repay parents for everything they’ve done some way, shape, or form

13. Search God’s will for my life (even on a day to day basis)

14. Be honest in my walk with Christ

15. Give away my money, don’t spend it away

When I was writing this list, it hit me hard how much I’ve stopped giving these days. Sure, I give a small portion of my day to do the dishes for my mom. I try and listen to my friends when they need an ear to complain to or a shoulder to cry on. 

But what else?

It’s not like those are a challenge or sacrifice for me. Of course they’re good to do, but are they actually something I can say I gave?

Here’s when I want to ask the question, is it enough? 

Is it enough to satisfy God? Am I considered a “good Christian” if I continue on doing just these small things?

What could I do that would please God?

Then I stop speaking and I can hear God laughing in the background. I remember then how stupid I must sound, thinking that the things I do decide how God feels about me. 

Grace upon grace. 

God loves me. Period. No matter what. Seriously. Nothing I do can make Him love me any less OR ANY MORE than He does already. And considering He loves me quite a lot already, it’s kind of foolish to think about ways to give in order to gain MORE of His love and admiration. 

So what then?

I keep doing dishes and listening to people? Then I’m good right? Cause God already loves me as much as He could? 

I’m set, right?

Then I hear Him laughing again.

Right…not so easy. 

Once again, God helps me remind myself that YES I should be giving more. Giving as much as I possibly can. But not to earn more of His love. But to show more of MY love for HIM. I know God is always going to love me. He said so in the book of Joshua “I will not leave you or forsake you” (Joshua 1:5). His love endures forever. As His love flows into me, I can use my actions to be an example of His love, spreading His love to others.

I’ve decided to start giving more. To gain pleasure from giving to others than just myself. God knows that I’ll keep asking “Is it enough?” Before cutting myself off to remember “Grace upon grace,” but He’ll love me the same nonetheless. No matter what I do, I’m His creation, His child. He’s going to stand by me with every dream I’ll check off my bucket list. 

Even though elephants aren’t the safest animals, and there’s no possibility I’ll ever own one, I still love them the same.